Friend of th Feather
Annie Bond Los Angeles, CA
Age: 26 at diagnosis, 35 currently
Reason for Mastectomy: Lumpectomy and lymph node resection
One thing I wish I would have known about surgery:
I wish I had known I was going to have drains! Since I was getting a lumpectomy and they weren't sure how many lymph nodes would have to be removed, I was under the impression that I wouldn’t have drains. It was not a fun surprise to wake up to! I had barely even looked them up because I was so convinced that I wouldn’t have to deal with them so we were clueless.
One thing I wish I would have known about recovery:
I definitely underestimated how much my limited movement would affect my everyday life. I had just had a liver resection as well, so I had limited use of my abdomen and my arms! Thankfully I had a great support system but it was much more difficult than I could have ever anticipated.
What brought me joy during my recovery (comfort foods, beverages, shows, books, support community, etc.):
I made the reckless and genius decision to get 2 kittens and a puppy during treatment and it was the best decision I have ever made. They continue to bring me so much joy and heal me in ways no medicine ever could. I also weirdly loved watching Grey’s Anatomy during treatment. It almost made the hospital more fun? I would sit around and imagine what all the hot hot gossip was with the doctors and nurses. Honestly, a fantastic distraction from the trauma that is cancer treatment.
What was a trigger for me during my recovery:
Anytime I would try to do something “normal” or that I “used to love”. I remember going out to dance at the gay bars in WeHo with my best friend, which is normally something I would love, but all I felt was anxiety and fear. And I didn’t know how to express it when everyone else was having fun and being “normal”. It was so confusing to feel myself changing so drastically and have no control over it.
Why did I choose my reconstruction pathway?
I was metastatic at my diagnosis, so my decisions have always been weighted dierently than they would be for an earlier stage patient. My cancer is very estrogen positive, so thankfully shrunk enough to safely do a lumpectomy and lymph node resection. I also do not have a family history or any genetic mutations, so we wanted to start with the least invasive surgery we could.
Biggest hurdle I faced and how I overcame it:
I am most proud of myself for seeking support for my mental health. I was drowning and I had no idea how to stop it. I had my family and friends all around me and a loving boyfriend, but I had no idea how to talk about what I was feeling with them because I felt like a burden and didn’t want to add to that. Once I got a therapist and joined a support group, I immediately knew I wasn’t alone in these feelings and just needed the right place and people to help me process them. Cancer is trauma and we have to treat out mental health with the same importance as our physical health.
Share any wisdom or advice you have for post-surgery appointments and doctor’s visits:
Write down any questions you want to ask! I always forget things if I don’t write them down and the time with your doctor can go so fast. I get scans all the time, and dealing with scanxiety is no fun at all! Take good care of yourself by asking your doctor for calming meds if you need them, remember to breathe, and always get a treat after! Scans are a tool for knowledge, and knowledge will give you power, so remember that they are good.
The product(s) that saved me during recovery:
I am a big advocate for cannabis and cancer care. It helped me with so many of the side effects I had and continue to have without adding any additional side effects! I hope we are able to do more research soon so doctors can feel empowered to encourage use in cancer patients. Also Aquaphor is the greatest thing we’ve ever invented.
My best piece of advice for anyone about to undergo their mastectomy
LET PEOPLE HELP YOU. It is so hard to get these surgeries and there’s always some kind of curveball that will be thrown at you. It’s inevitable. Let people help if they oer. Ask people to help before you need it. Community is everything and cancer is far too difficult to do alone.
Anything else you want to share:
My first oncologist gave me 3-5 years to live. I will celebrate 9 next month. You are not a statistic. There is new science and new medicines coming out all the time. There is so much hope. The medicine that saved my life came out a couple months before my diagnosis. Keep going. And always advocate for yourself!